Flashback: The Psych Eval.

Man oh man… I am pretty sure with this one I was getting an unknown free therapy session I shit you not people… I shit you not. 

Let me start off by saying … This guy was terribly unphotogenic. When I first saw him I was like “well maybe I’ll give this creepy looking guys a chance…”

He seemed so fascinating and he held such a legit conversation online I mean… What was I supposed to do?! ( the answer is say no. I should have said no).

So decide we should meet up for coffee in the AM before work and just like you know… First date B.S. 

I get there and I dressed like shit. I mean I was so grungy and my hair was half did because I was getting it colored that day. I wore a big ass tank top and I just looked like trash. I remember thinking too… ” this isn’t first date attire Brianna the fuck are you doing ?!”

I also remember my friend Dan telling me probably not a good idea…. Well he was right again. 

I get there. I walk in. Suspense. I wait and I see this EXTREMELY attractive guy waving at me and I’m like … 

No. Fucking. Way. 

Well yea fucking way. And I wore my grungy attire. I didn’t brush my hair. Dating life -1; Brianna -0. 

So we get some coffee we sit down and he starts the conversation so casually with the hi how are you ? What’s new? 

And we start talking about careers. My least favorite subject. He goes ….

” yes well I teach abnormal psychology at UNR, what do you do? “

And I go … Because I’m smooth everyone remember this… 

” oh that’s amazing! I work in a warehouse. It sucks. Sorry about how I’m dressed I’m completely unprepared.”

Smooth… Smooth.. 

Him : ” oh no you’re fine!”

Me: ” anyways! What do you do for fun when you’re not working ?”

Him: ” oh I hold dinner parties with my friends and I love to cook. I travel sometimes ! Do you cook?”

Me: “um no I don’t cook. I’m terrible at cooking. I can bake. I love to travel too… I have friend. Parties.” (Smooth round 3) 

Now let’s just say at this point I can’t look him in the eyes. He’s perfect in almost all ways. He’s smooth, he’s cute, he’s funny, he has a great job! He’s tall! He’s different and interesting… And he’s in no way attracted to me at all. 

Rejection and failure I am a professional at people. I have that shit on lock. 

Him: ” so do you get along well with your family ?”

Me: “um sure most of them. Except my mom and my sister and …”

And I ranted. 

And he goes

” well I’ve got to get to class but it was so great to meet you! Let’s hang out again okay? Maybe you can come to one of my lectures “

And I’m thinking hmm maybe I don’t know rejection right? WRONG. 

I was then ghosted as I’ve done so many times. One must learn… She to can be ghosted. 

& that’s how I was secretly diagnosed as crazy. Ciao good looking psych teacher I hope you’re well! 


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