Parents Advice

I love when my parents try to get involved in my dating life, it’s quite hilarious.

Let me give you some background–

My dad and my stepmom have been together for like ever it feels like ( I really can’t remember how long now… 15 years? 16 years? ) a long time now– anyways they are 12 1/2 years apart in age. My dad is 51 and my stepmom is 39 now… when they met she was like 18-19? And at that point in time he had 3 kids already with two different women ( my dad is a whore :p ) just kidding dad!

So anyways, my older brother is married and has two kids and one on the way, my sister who is younger than me has a kid but isn’t married, and then there is me kid-less and single, and then my 15 year old sister who is thankfully kid less ( for a long time she better be or else) .

Well anyways since according to the old days and the laws of the old world that everyone has embedded in their brains no matter what, I would be an old wench who would die alone at 25 right? No kids, no husband… imagine the character i would be in a Jane Austen novel… to die by my pen alone and childless– what an abomination!

So here is my families logic:

My dad and stepmom think I need me either a 19 year old I can train – OH MY GOD DAD.
Or a 38-40 year old who has his shit together and can treat me like a man – OH MY GOD DAD. No in- between just 19 or 40…. umm not gunna happen dad sorry.

My real mother, she thinks i need like 21-23– she said younger is better– OH MY GOD MOM. Seriously though, all she has ever dated is younger men… I am seeing a pattern here.

My grandma…. she keeps her opinions to herself but I am starting to get convinced she also agrees I am going to die alone since every time she sees or talks to me she asks me if I have a new man in my life… sorry grandma… I am an old wench doomed to be alone, no grand kids from this grand daughter.

My brother and his wife — they think older.
My sister whose 22- she thinks older.
My 15 year old sister- she doesn’t get an opinion cause she is still 3 years old in my eyes.

But what i like to remind them is, I have never listened to them when it comes to dating! They have hated every single boyfriend I’ve had haha.

Just thought I’d share a little parent humor this morning.
I have taken myself off social media and dating sites for a little… I need a mental break… I’d rather be single right now then keep dating these psychos.



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